At Cozy in Grace, I often share messages of faith, hope, and encouragement. Today, I wanted to share something deeply personal—why “This Side of Heaven” by Seph Schlueter means so much to me.
There are songs that you listen to and enjoy, and then there are songs that seem to find you exactly when you need them. Songs that put words to feelings you’ve carried for years. For me, “This Side of Heaven” is one of those songs.
I know it wasn’t written specifically for me, but every time I hear it, I feel connected to its message in a way that’s hard to explain.
My story begins when I was just four years old.
I became critically ill with meningococcal septicaemia. My condition was so severe that my heart stopped twice. There were moments when my family didn’t know if I would survive. The doctors did everything they could, but the outcome was uncertain.
By God’s grace, I lived.
The illness left me with scars that I still carry today. My legs are covered in them - a permanent reminder of a battle I fought before I was old enough to understand it. At one point, I was told I might never walk again.
Yet here I am.
Every step I take reminds me of how precious life is and how much I have to be thankful for. The scars that once felt like imperfections have become part of my testimony. They tell a story of survival, strength, and God’s faithfulness.
As I grew older, life brought different kinds of battles.
I lost my dad.
The grief was overwhelming, and with it came questions that I couldn’t answer. I struggled to understand why God would allow such pain. Slowly, my faith faded. I drifted away from Him and tried to make sense of life on my own.
For years, I felt distant from God.
Then, last year, I lost my mum.
Losing both of my parents has been one of the most painful experiences of my life. There are moments when the grief feels impossible to put into words. Anyone who has lost someone they love knows that certain pieces of your heart never quite feel the same again.
But in the middle of that heartbreak, something unexpected happened.
I found my way back to God.
Not because everything suddenly made sense.
Not because the pain disappeared.
Not because I finally had all the answers.
I came back because I realised that through every chapter of my life, through sickness, survival, grief, loss, and heartbreak - God had never left me.
Even when I walked away from Him, He never walked away from me.
That’s why “This Side of Heaven” touches me so deeply.
The song reminds me that we live in a world where pain exists. This side of heaven, we experience loss, illness, disappointment, and grief. We say goodbye to people we love. We carry scars that others can’t always see.
But we also carry hope.
Hope that one day there will be no more sickness.
Hope that there will be no more tears.
Hope that death will not have the final word.
Hope that through Jesus, this life is not the end of our story.
When I listen to this song, I think about the little four year old girl whose heart stopped twice. I think about the scars on my legs. I think about losing my dad. I think about losing my mum. And I think about the God who carried me through every single one of those moments.
I don’t understand every reason behind the things I’ve experienced.
I don’t know why I survived when the odds were against me.
I don’t know why I had to lose both of my parents.
But I do know this: God has been faithful through it all.
Today, when I hear “This Side of Heaven,” I don’t just hear a song.
I hear a reminder that God is still writing my story.
I hear a reminder that my scars don’t define me.
I hear a reminder that grief isn’t the end.
And I hear a reminder that one day, on the other side of heaven, every tear will be wiped away, every wound healed, and every goodbye redeemed.
Until then, I will keep trusting Him.
Because this side of heaven isn’t forever.
And that gives me hope.